Jbryans’s Weblog

July 1, 2009

{ July 1, 2009 @ 8:07 pm } · { parenting }
{ Tags: children, daughter, new baby, parenting, prayer } · { Leave a Comment }

I am a new mom again. This time a little girl. Her name is Devri. She is named after her dad. His middle name is Devry. She is such a sweet little baby girl and I am enjoying having a new little one in the house.

She is a very happy baby. She smiles and laughs and coos at me all the time. I look forward to every moment that I have with her. I tell her that one day we will be best friends-when she is about 25. Until then, I have to be the best parent that I can be. This is easy when she is a baby, but I know in the years ahead we will have our differences. I just pray that God gives me the wisdom, knowledge and understanding of how to speak into her life. I know most importantly I have to be praying for her daily. This is an important aspect of parenting for me. I pray for both of my children every day and I look forward to watching their lives play out before me.

My two little sweethearts

Life’s Messes

{ June 25, 2009 @ 12:56 am } · { Faith, Ponderings }
{ Tags: Christian life, God, Jon and Kate, LIFE, messes } · { Leave a Comment }

Funny how you can go through life feeling like everything is o.k., good even, and then you look around. I mean a good look around. And you realize that you have made a terrible mess of things. Sometimes the “messes” in our life take years to develop, but other messes can be made by the slip of the tongue and/or poor judgement on our part. A “mess” could be anything that causes a distraction in your life and takes you away from what God’s perfect plan is for your life. I think debt is a huge mess that some of us get ourselves into. Then we pray that God would send us a financial blessing. Why should God bless us with money when we didn’t handle our other money wisely? Isn’t there a parable about that in the gospels? Other messes involve relationships in our life. It is so easy to make a mess of relationships. The wrong words are spoken or the right words are spoken, but not received. Or sometimes, nothing at all is spoken, but vain imaginations run wild and we begin to think, “Maybe this person doesn’t like me. I must have done something wrong. Well, she can just get over herself…” etc. etc. Why do we do this? What a mess!

Thankfully, we have a God who is kind and tender-hearted toward us. He helps us clean up our messes. He doesn’t always clean them up for us, but with His divine guidance, the messes can be cleaned up. Sometimes we fight with Him (and ourself) about who will clean up the mess. Ex., We pray, “God please show so and so that they are wrong and please fix this situation for me.” He tells us, “No. You should humble yourself and apologize.”

I think there are several ways our “messes” get cleaned up. First, God has to bring revelation knowledge. Before we can fix our mess, we have to have knowledge that there is a mess. As a mom, I am constantly seeing the messes that my 3 year-old son Sam makes. I refuse to clean up a pile of toys that he dumps out in the middle of the floor to play with for 5 minutes. He does not see the mess. He will play and then walk away and not think a thing of it. It is my responsibility as his mother to show him the mess and teach him to pick up after himself. At other times, we are very aware of the mess, but we are overwhelmed with how to clean it up. Let’s revisit the toys dumped out on the floor. Sam has no problem doing the dumping; however, when I tell him it is time to clean up, he whines and says it is too hard. I hear myself telling him, “you didn’t need help making the mess, you shouldn’t need help cleaning it up.” I am so glad that God does not tell me that when I cry out to Him. Maybe I should be a little easier on Sam.

Sometimes, God helps us fix our messes in baby steps. We recently began taking the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University class. The first thing he talks about is taking baby steps to get out of debt. I was able to apply this same principle with Sam picking up his toys. He dumped his toys out once again and played briefly and then wanted me to clean the mess up for him. I told him to pick up five toy cars at a time and put them in the box. He began to pick the toys up in increments of five (well maybe not always five, but you get the drift) and before he knew it, he had picked up all the toys by himself. I think this was a great lesson for him about cleaning up his mess in “baby steps” and it was a great accomplishment for me as a mom that a lesson was taught. Yea, mom.

There are times when we find ourselves involved in a “mess” that we did not make. Sometimes we do become victim to our circumstances. These are some of the most trying times because they cause confusion and probably some separation from other parties involved. Divorce is a fine example. Jon and Kate of the popular “Jon and Kate Plus 8″ reality t.v. show announced Monday that they are divorcing. Divorce is such a common outlet now, but that does not take away from the damage that is caused from it. Their children will most likely at some point be confused about their parents’ relationship and they will suffer some separation. I married into a family with divorce. I have step-children who had to accept me as their dad’s new wife. This was hard for them and hard for me. I did not cause this divorce, but because of the “mess” left in the path, these relationships were hard to build.

Whatever the mess, there is always a way to clean it up. Seek God, seek wisdom. He will lead the way if you ask.

Funny Things that Sam Said

{ January 12, 2009 @ 9:14 pm } · { Sam }
{ } · { Comments (3) }

Sam has said some funny things lately. A couple of months ago at Mother’s Day Out he had an accident on his nap mat. His teachers told John that they couldn’t get mad at him because he told them with a serious look on his face, “This was not my idea.”

Then a few weeks later, my friend Priscilla was over at the house and she was trying to get Sam to say something in Spanish. He told her, “I can’t say that, Tia. I am not dark.” We both laughed so hard. I guess he thinks only “dark” people speak Spanish.

Just last week John was having a discussion with Sam about how he needs to be obedient and that if he is not obedient, then he (John) is going to make Sam’s life hard. Before the last word was out of John’s mouth, Sam said, “No, Daddy. I need it squishy.” So much for a serious discussion!

Birthday Parties

{ January 12, 2009 @ 9:06 pm } · { Faith, Ponderings, Sam }
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I wrote this back in July and never did post it. So here it is…

Sam is three now. I can hardly believe how quickly time goes by. We celebrated his birthday this past weekend with a dinosaur party. I know it sounds ridiculous, but there were thirteen kids present; six who couldn’t come. Counting the parents also, we had close to thirty people in our backyard.

I wonder what God thinks about children’s birthday parties. Does He think that we go overboard? Does He think it is a waste of time and money? Are we spoiling our kids too much? Or, maybe this is how He feels about us. Maybe there is a big party going on in heaven to celebrate our re-birth in Christ? Do you know the date that you claimed Him as your Lord and Savior? I think that is the real “birth” day that we should celebrate. I imagine that God and all the angels like a good party!

my three-year old made me do it

{ August 11, 2008 @ 9:08 pm } · { Sam }
{ Tags: children, three year old, two year old } · { Comments (2) }

This must be where he learns it!

: He must be up to something!

Before I had a child of my own, I was the person who looked on with disdain as a preschooler acted out and I would say to myself, “my child will NEVER act like that.” At our church there was a fountain outside that all the children would run to after service. Those who were unsupervised would sometimes manage to get a little wet. My childless friend Keisha and I would huddle to the side and say, “our kids will never do that!” And, then, my sister had a child before me and I would sometimes be around her little boy and I would again think to myself, “If my child acts like that, I will just spank him and make him mind me. She needs to show him who is in control.” Boy, have things changed!

My son, Sam is three now and whoever first spoke the term “terrible two’s” was not talking about my son. We loved being two. Sam is no angel, but we never had any major behavior problems at two. But, he turned three only two weeks ago and, boy, is he enjoying “discovering” himself. I think we must go through several stages in life when we say, “I am discovering who I am”. I am convinced that is now happening with my sweet, adorable two-year old has been. He turned three and he decided, “I need to find myself. I need to test some uncharted territories in my life.” Pretty profound for a three-year old, I know. But, let me give you an example. In the past, when we have gone places I would always get comments like, “He is so calm” and “What a well-behaved child” and even some snide looks from other parents as they would run after their wild-child. I must have been getting a little prideful about this because since Sam has turned three, God has been allowing some pretty crazy stuff to happen. And even though I know God is not making these things happen, I have a feeling He is probably somewhat amused by it all. Sam and I went to church with my parents just last Wednesday night. Most of the evening he just wanted to lay on my shoulder or hold my hand. So sweet. As soon as church was over, he didn’t want anything to do with me. He just wanted to run after a group of four-year old boys. No problem. I guess if other parents are allowing their children to run free, then Sam can too as long I can see him. So, I tried to keep my eye on him as I visited. Next thing I know, I am jumping out of my skin because someone (namely, “Sam”) has come up behind me and has bitten my behind. Yes, he bit my bottom! This is not funny. Especially, because we are not even with people who we know. So, now I am merely making excuses for his behavior. Saying things like, “he doesn’t usually act this way.” And, I am most certain that bystanders are thinking, “she needs to do something with that child.” We left pretty quickly after that happened, because short of beating him, what could I do? At least it was my bottom and not some random stranger…that definitely would have been worse.

The next day we went to the mall. We were visiting friends and we did not have our stroller. Big mistake. We went into a clothing store and Sam immediately heads for a rack of clothes that he can hide in. He loves this. I let him hide in the rack of clothes that we were looking at. What harm, right? Well, when it was time to move to another section of the store, he would not come willingly. So, I have to pull him out by the one arm I managed to grab and try to have a serious talk about how he needs to stay with me. Again, I say, “uncharted territory” is on his little brain. As soon as he can pull away from me, he is off. I tell him to stop and he begins laughing and running around the whole store. Yes, I had to chase him. I was so embarrassed and, once again, I can picture God up there chuckling. He made it around the entire store before I finally caught him and whisked him into a dressing room. I am sure people knew what was going on in that room, but noone seemed to mind that my child was being disciplined. It was a pleasant surprise to actually feel like people thought I was doing the “right” thing. Maybe it was because I was in one of those trendy stores that attracts teenagers and they were just oblivious to what was going on…who knows?

I am sure there will be many more adventures with Sam as his borders continue to expand. I look forward to everyone of them…even the ones that make me want to scream and cover my face in horror (or shame). I love watching him grow up and explore new things. I want to always be there to guide him in the right direction and keep him safe, and I want to remember every single detail of these days, because I know they will not last forever. I just hope he gains some better judgement soon!

We Can’t Make (or keep) Everyone Happy!

{ July 29, 2008 @ 11:34 pm } · { Ponderings }
{ Tags: frustrated, happy, people, vacation } · { Leave a Comment }

I have discovered one of the reasons why John and I are so exhausted in life. We are constantly trying to keep people happy. If it is not work related, such as customers, insurance reps, employees, etc., then it is friends, church leaders, church members and (of course) family.

We love being loved and needed, but sometimes we need a break. We went on vacation last week and really enjoyed the time away from the shop and from the “busy-ness” of life. However, since we got back, we have done nothing but work to make people happy around us who happened to get “unhappy” while we were gone. The most frustrating thing about it is we didn’t even know we did anything to make people upset. And, even though we had a restful and relaxing vacation, I can almost guarantee that next year when I start trying to plan a vacation, John is going to basically refuse to go. God help us!

Are You in Season?

{ July 9, 2008 @ 7:10 pm } · { Faith, Ponderings }
{ Tags: Matthew, salt, salty, steak, Timothy } · { Leave a Comment }

About a year ago, a good friend recommended some Canadian Steak Seasoning that her and her husband love. I purchased the seasoning and put it in the pantry in hopes that my husband the griller, who is so resistant to trying anything new, would be willing to give it a try. He did finally decide to use the seasoning. He made some juicy, mouth-watering steaks. When I took my first bite, I noticed that it tasted very salty. We discussed the saltiness of the steaks and agreed that next time he should probably not use as much (did I mention that my husband is an extremist?). The next several times, we had the same results. Way too salty! So, I decided to tell my friend about the problem. She very simply asked, “Are you following the directions on the bottle?”. My mind quickly processed what had been going on-of course we weren’t reading the bottle. It was steak seasoning. We can use as much or as little as we want, right? Wrong! So, I read the directions on the bottle and made a marinade with the seasoning. I put the marinade on the steaks and let them sit for a few hours. John came home later and grilled the steaks and the taste was perfect. Not too salty. Just right. Good enough to make you say, “I look forward to the next time we grill steak” and “I wonder if this stuff will work on vegetables and chicken.”

I learn so many lessons from life experience. The first and most obvious lesson here is, “Always read the directions first.” As a teacher, I should know this. My only excuse is that I have not been in the classroom for a few years now. But, there is also an underlying message in this story.

I began to think about this seasoning being too salty and it led me to think of Matt. 5:13 that says, “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.” I know that we are to be the salt of the earth as the book of Matthew commands, but, I wonder, can we as Christians ever be too salty? Even though it is not biblical, maybe there is some wisdom to the old saying that if you are too heavenly minded you are no earthly good. I believe that God wants us to have balance in every area of our life. This is not to say that we balance our godliness with worldliness. The point is that we cannot become self-righteous in our piety. We will become like the potent steak seasoning that left a thirsty aftertaste if we are not seasoned with the right ingredients.

Surely there are times in all of our lives when we do not feel like we are in season. You become tired and unmotivated to walk out your faith. It happens to us all. Paul writes in 2 Timothy 4:2, “Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage-with great patience and careful instruction.” So, even when we are out of season, it is still our responsibility to be prepared. Where is God sending you? What is His still small voice telling you to do? Are you listening? The second part of this verse says to “correct, rebuke, and encourage-with great patience and careful instruction.” Don’t be too hasty in passing judgement upon your brother or sister in Christ. Be careful to read the directions and mix in the correct elements-faith, hope, and love (the greatest of these is love).

I am working very hard on staying “in season”. If we are not “in season”, can we truly preach the word and be prepared? I encourage you to not be too salty, but on the other hand, don’t water down your faith either. The Word of God says, “if the salt loses it saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.” There is also nothing savory about a piece of bland, unseasoned steak. Don’t allow yourself to become unseasoned. Pray and listen to God and walk out your faith daily.

Infusion 2008

{ June 27, 2008 @ 9:05 pm } · { WLC }
{ Tags: Infusion, WOMEN, women's conference } · { Comments (1) }

As a large part of our women’s ministry, we have an annual women’s conference. This year we decided to brand our conference. It is called “Infusion”. Every year now we will have our Infusion Women’s Conference.

We held Infusion 2008 last weekend, June 20th-21st. Our theme for the conference was ”A Dance with Destiny”. As a team, our committee felt led in this direction because it is such a prevalent topic in our society right now. We all have a purpose and there is no better way to live than to be walking with passion while pursuing your purpose.

Tisa Sanderson was our MC for the event. Judy Brisky and Kami Collins were our featured guests. Judy Brisky is from Southlake, TX where she and her husband are in ministry at Gateway Church. Kami Collins pastors along side her husband Clint here in Big Spring, TX at Life Church. Both ladies were wonderful speakers. They were humorous yet sensitive, witty and relational, and most importantly they brought forth the Word of God and ministered to all those who were present. We also had an incredible worship team assembled with Beth Cassel, Clay Collins, Jason Sanderson and the musicians from Life Church’s worship team. They really ushered in the Holy Spirit and set the tone for the whole conference.

In keeping with our theme, that Friday night, after Judy Brisky spoke, we had a dance in our youth room. It is a pretty large room, so we cleared everything out except a p.a. system and a large disco ball (that’s right, we hung a disco ball!) and the ladies let loose. We were nervous that people wouldn’t want to dance, but, boy, were we wrong. We even have pictures to prove it! We also set up a large table with chips and dips and drinks and served a large sheet cake with our logo imprinted on the top. It was much fun!

On Saturday, we served a light breakfast before convening back for worship and to hear Pastor Kami speak. After a short break, we had break-out sessions where several different speakers held classes and spoke specifically on a certain topic. Since our theme was about destiny and dancing, all the tied into that and really served as a way to get the women into smaller groups where they felt more comfortable to open up and get ministered to if they so desired. The titles for the break-outs were:

The Argentine Tango with Kimberly Long-Our walk with God is like unto a romantic dance. We long to be held passionately close by our Savior. And, as we make advancements in our walk with God, we sometimes find it difficult. However, the difficult times are what yield more intimacy with Him.
The Waltz with Martha Cook-Like the Waltz, learning to walk with the Lord is not complicated. Learning to trust in HIm and to listen to the Holy Spirit helps you find God’s grace and enter into a refreshing place of rest.
The Rumba with Christina Segundo-The Rumba is a dance that emphasizes the man’s strength (God) and the lady’s femininity (us). The man creates a frame (His plan & purpose for our life) through subtle movements (the Holy Spirit’s leading) in which to present her.

After the break-out sessions, we had lunch at a local cafe called “Just Peachy”. They are located in an old house and the decorations make you feel like you are at a tea party. It was the perfect atmosphere for a large group of women diners. Also, throughout the conference we had doorprizes. Local vendors around town donated all of the doorprizes. As a promotional part of the conference, we had t-shirts and writing pens with our logo available. We also set up a resource table from our local Christian bookstore, The Master’s Touch.

Overall, it was a huge success. I feel so blessed to have been a part of such an event. The team that put this together gets better every year. I admire and respect all of the women involved for their committment and there love for God’s daughters. As Judy Brisky said, “You Rock!”

I can’t wait to see what God puts together for next year’s conference!

Fight the Good Fight

{ June 13, 2008 @ 5:17 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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Have you ever felt like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders? Like noone understands where you are coming from? Like if one more negative thing happens in your life that you are going to crack like a dropped egg? I am having a day like that today. And just when I want to go and throw myself across the bed and have a pity party, I feel the presence of the Lord wash over me. It is like a cleansing rain that refreshes the soul. I am thankful that I have a powerful God who cares about how I feel and what I am going through. It is only because of my faith that I can push through times like this and I will never understand how others make it through life without Him.

My thoughts lead me to this verse-”I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” II Timothy 4:7

Mentoring

{ June 9, 2008 @ 9:33 pm } · { Faith }
{ Tags: Dannah Gresh, God, mentor, Moses, teenager } · { Comments (4) }

My niece is very unique when compared to today’s average teenager. She is a godly young woman who is actively seeking the face of God. She possesses wisdom beyond her years and a spirit of humility that is all to often absent for this generation of youth. I am not deceived in my thoughts of her. Yes, I know her and love her dearly. Yes, at times, I think that she can do no wrong (smile). She is very dear to me. When I entered her family 12 years ago, she was my flower girl. For a year prior, she was my shadow. So, to say that she has a special place in my heart, is a mild understatement. But, I have seen her grow up. I have witnessed the instruction, the discipline, the time and the love that was invested in her by her parents. For the last four years she has spent several weeks out of her summer working for John and I in the office of our auto body shop. She has displayed a wonderful work ethic. She gets herself up every morning and prepares for the day. She works from 8 a.m. to 5:30p.m. everyday and never once asked if she could take a day off. We pay her for her duties. But, she is not working because she lacks for anything. She just loves being with us in Big Spring. The few weeks per summer that we have her with us is the part that we look forward to most. She is seventeen now and this is the summer before her senior year-most likely the last summer that we will have her with us like this. I already miss it! During the time that she has been here, we have built an even closer friendship. She has confided in me things that I know were some of her deepest thoughts and feelings.

She is with us now and a couple of weeks before her arrival she asked me a question. She asked me if I would pray about being her mentor. She is dating a boy who lives nearby and they are planning on seeing a lot of each other while she is here. She is reading a book by Dannah Gresh called and the Bride Wore White. The author recommends that young women find a mentor in who they can go to with questions and support. She likens a mentor as unto a “Moses”. This is what she says, “When I think of Moses, I think of the burning bush and the passion that it brought to his life. He took some of the power of God that he received at that bush and used it in the lives of other people. When I think of women in my life who were like Moses to me, I think of a burning, passionate flame.” She challenges the young women, “Find a burning flame…find a burning flame in your life to look for guidance and encouragement.” When I read this, I have a rush of emotions. I am honored that she sees me as a Moses in her life. I am scared that I might guide her in the wrong direction. I am also led to think back to the different Moses’ in my life. But, mostly I feel a deep sense of responsibility. I am going to be seeking God out daily during this process. This is going to lead me closer to God. She is not only listening to my words, but she is studying my life. I pray that I don’t fail her, but mostly I pray that I do not fail God.

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